Recommended by Real Academy: "Practice for a Stronger Mind," written by Damon Zahariades. There was a time when the expression "mental breakdown" was in vogue. It is short for a collapse of one's mind, and while I had a vague sense of what "mental" meant, I did not know its precise definition.
This book defines mental strength as follows: "Mental strength too can be built up to be strong over time. Mental strength means the state of the mind. That is, it includes not only enduring hard situations but also a positive attitude and view toward adversity. It means acknowledging that adversity is inevitable in our lives, quietly holding on, and understanding that it is a process for achieving goals and gaining a better future. Seen in this light, mental strength is closer to stoicism than to grit."
For me, building mental strength as a parent is harder than the professional side. It is not easy even to secure the time I want (for now I have decided to make use of the morning hours), and I face different stoic situations every day and every hour that knowledge or experience cannot cover. More than once or twice I have shown a side of myself I did not even know and regretted it before sleep. Haha. This book focuses on simple theory and content you can apply right away today, and is composed to be easy to read. There are points worth using at work, at home, and personally too, so it is worth a read.
The first chapter defines and introduces mental strength, the second covers the components of mental strength, and the third lays out concrete ways to practice. The author argues that if you read this book and come to have a strong mind, there are various benefits.
A person with strong mental strength:
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Does not obsess over things beyond their influence
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Has the flexibility to deal pliantly with the unexpected
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Knows themselves accurately and concretely
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Has a strong will to confront uncertain situations
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Skillfully regulates emotions
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Quickly shakes off disappointment and gets back up
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Is a practical realist
If you have ever felt powerless, gripped by the thought that you do not want to do anything or that you could not do it, your mind needs to grow stronger. Because with such a frail mind you cannot achieve what you want. For an individual to show excellence over a long period, they must have a strong mind.
The things from this book worth trying to practice are as follows.
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Building habits; moving forward little by little with steady habits
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Gratitude; "this too I am grateful for," finding something to be thankful for in negative situations
Chapter 2 1) Factors that sway the mind
- Emotion
Look back on both positive and negative emotions. Acknowledge those emotions. When a negative emotion surfaces, examine it closely. When a negative emotion surfaces, examine it closely. Ask yourself, "Is this emotion reasonable?" If not, think about how these emotions hold you back.
Five minutes of meditation every day. Is this a situation where I can exert my influence? If exerting it is of no use, let it go. Even when you cannot know the outcome, try taking action. Sleep well, eat well, exercise. Physical health affects mental health. *Practical training, e.g.) anger: my behavior; venting anger at another person unrelated to the situation that occurred.
Future change; when angry, take five deep breaths. Spend 10 minutes looking for cute cat photos. e.g.) fluster: psychologically frozen, unable to do anything. Future change; find one thing you can do right now and just do it.
- The inner critic;
Excels at catastrophic thinking (you'll fail), guilt, overgeneralization, the use of absurdly extreme expressions (you "always" say the wrong thing, you "never"~), an all-success-or-failure framing, predicting a negative future. Distance yourself from negative people (cynical, skeptical, frequently dispirited, complaining, blaming, ...).
- Attitude
Resilience: the ability to revive from unexpected difficulties, -> mental strength; the coping ability to think and act positively even within such experiences. Discard the thought that every problem will end in catastrophe. The easiest way to discard self-pity; be grateful.
- Confidence: others' approval is not important
- Don't trust it, the will is weak by nature
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Delayed gratification; controlling impulse. Learning to bear discomfort.
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Will and motivation; will: the ability to delay gratification to achieve a goal
Motivation: engagement, action, instinct. The secret to acting even without willpower and motivation is to rely on habit. Create routines and rituals that drive you to take action automatically.
- Habit; when life veers off my plan and unexpected setbacks come crashing in, habits and routines help me stay on the normal track.
When you struggle and are crushed by pressure, habit moves us forward almost like autopilot. Habit reveals what I value. "If you want to build a new habit, make it so easy you cannot refuse." When building a new habit, proceed at my own pace.
- How to truly grow strong by going beyond your limits
- Self-discipline: focus on the goal.
Self-discipline is a necessary condition for mental strength. 1) An environment free of temptations 2) Small steps 3) An action plan; do not leave it to chance. A reasonable strategy to act with focus in a consistent way 4) Getting used to short-term discomfort 5) Immersing yourself only in the task before you
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Giving up
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Boredom; arises in the process of mastering
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Finland's sisu spirit
- Do not be overwhelmed by the situation. Devote yourself to action. Practice emotional resilience daily, anticipate problems
- Failure
The book is thin and reads quickly. A practical, practice-focused book; published as an e-book, it became famous without advertising and went on to be released as a print book, reaching number one on Amazon. ★ 4/5